were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
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