Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
