ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize