You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Sext me about skeletons
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
