You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
