DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
