I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
