That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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