My brain says no but my pants say off.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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