Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Randomize
