its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
