Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Randomize
