So drunk, too bad you don't want this
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I could fuck to npr.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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