Have you finally orgasmed yet?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
