Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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