i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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