Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
