I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
