hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Randomize
