I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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