Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
