At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
