Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
