my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
