I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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