I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
