We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
