I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
You're a waste of cheezeits
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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