Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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