Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
