I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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