Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
