I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
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