The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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