U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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