I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Randomize
