On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
