your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
