I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Holy shit dude........stairs
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
