I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
sex in a hospital.. check
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
