Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Randomize
