Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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