is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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