This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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