I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Randomize
