Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
