It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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