Buhtt sex?
i think i have two assholes
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
