he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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