Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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